Yeah, I know this blog is about two weeks late, but as someone who typically makes the traditional, “I’m gonna lose weight this year!” -type of resolutions, I decided to take my time this year and be thoughtful.
A look back
To truly take stock and look at what I want to accomplish in the year ahead, I need to review the year behind us.
2019 felt like a dumpster fire at times.
It started with the death of a hometown friend in January. The s*&%show revved up in February and March with both my mother-in-law and mother serving time in the hospital. I had surgery in May that was a literal punch in the gut. June and July slapped me in the face with the end of my 13-year relationship, followed closely by the death of my 14-year-old cat. In October, I learned my job would be changing, but I wouldn’t find out much more than that for nearly three months. And in December… I turned 40.
So “f” isn’t just “farewell” to 2019 for me. I am glad to put that year to bed and move on.
However, in the middle of everything, I found the true meaning of love and friendship. I learned that no matter the obstacle, I have people in my life who love and support me. I helped a friend usher in a new era of her life in a house she customized. I got to go on a whirlwind trip with that same friend to Florida just to sit on the beach for one day and fly back home. I spent an entire week with those closest to me touring California. I spent holidays with my family. And by the end of it all, my former manpanion and I carved out a new path for a friendship.
New year, new decade, new outlook
Taking stock in all that was 2019, I created a list of things I’d like to accomplish in 2020.
I just re-signed a lease to stay in my current apartment for another year. Since it’s mine, I want to continue to make it feel that way. I’ve refurbished a bed, created original artwork and have some of my photographs on display, but in 2020 I want to do more. I still have several blank walls that could use some new memories. I have old furniture that I’d like to replace with something that says, “Dawn lives here.” And, I have storage bins filled with items I honestly haven’t seen in a decade. (Do I need that old newspaper with four articles I wrote in college? Isn’t that online somewhere by now?)
Now that I know what my new role is, I want to embrace it. My focus will be on videos, so I want to dive into new ways to tell stories. I want to be open to new ideas and welcome change. I have new team members that I want to get to know and learn from.
Fresh off a holiday season spent with my family, I want to spend more time with them in 2020. I learned a lot about my brother in the month of December. In fact, I learned that I actually like him. I mean, we all love our siblings, but we don’t have to like them.
I chatted with my older nephew and niece over Christmas, and want to get to know them better. I realized my nephew is going to college soon and I feel like I barely know him. I want to see my other nieces and nephew grow up. I want to be there for birthdays (as long as I don’t have to go to Chuck E. Cheese) and big events.
If I learned anything in 2019 it’s that my friends are some of the best humans on the planet. In 2020, I want to give back to them what they’ve put into me. From late-night therapy sessions, to weekend walks, to days of pampering, I want to truly be there for my friends. I want to show them what they mean to me.
I will make more time to reach out and visit with them and be present.
Mind, body & soul:
In 2020, I want to take more deep breaths and take in my surroundings. I have a habit of running from one thing to another and not fully realizing the magnitude of a situation until much later. I want to stop that practice.
I also want to continue to try more hobbies. In the latter part of 2019, I pretty much just stuck to baking and exercise. While I’m still enjoying those tasks (I’m on day 105 on closing all those activity rings), I want to branch out more. My sister-in-law has already co-signed glass blowing. One of my closest friends has agreed to try talking to more strangers with me. I may even take up dating…
I want to keep up my exercise routine. I went from just wanting to close those Apple Move Rings for seven straight days, to a full month, to closing out 2019. Now, I’ve set my sights on 180-straight days.
And, I want to read more. I am an audiobook person (because I am easily distracted), so I want to go back to my roots of sitting down with a good book. I want to turn the outside world off and focus on a hardcover in my hands.
Finally, I want to continue this blog. Writing is in my soul. It’s who I am. It’s who I’ve always been. In fact, for Christmas my brother bought me a beautiful leather-bound journal because he knows what writing means to me (see, how can you not like that guy?).
Even if the topics change, I want to continue to share my thoughts and journey with you all. Thank you for your support in 2019. Here’s to a joyous and adventurous 2020!